The Insurance Business: A Serio-Comic Drama in Pennsylvania German — Ezra Grumbine
Grumbine, M. D.. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org . If you are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this eBook. Title : Die Inshurance Business Author : Ezra Grumbine Release date : April 25, 2018 [eBook #57044] Language : German, English Other information and formats : www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/57044 Credits : Produced by The Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This file was produced from images generously made available by The Internet Archive) *** START OF DIE INSHURANCE BUSINESS. A SERIO-COMIC DRAMA IN THE PENNSYLVANIA GERMAN VERNACULAR, “AS SHE IS SPOKE” IN THE GERMAN DISTRICTS OF PENNSYLVANIA. BY E. GRUMBINE, M. D., MT. ZION, PA. PRICE, 20 CENTS. Sent Post-paid by the Author on Receipt of Price. Sold also by J. A. DeHuff, Bookseller, Lebanon, Pa. PRESS OF Report Publishing Co., Ltd. Lebanon, Pa. CHARACTERS. Yokle Brownschweiger and Frany Brownschweiger ,—An elderly couple with a debt on their farm. Sallie Brownschweiger ,—Their daughter. Old Grandmother Aunshitz ,—Mrs. Brownschweiger’s mother; a “good subject,” old and sickly, rather deaf. Henner Hoffman ,—An old neighbor who believes in the good old times of “Lang Syne.” Wm. Shwinefelt ,—Insurance agent for the Yubee Co. and other wild cat life insurance companies. Augustus Eslinger ,—A young store clerk of the village. Sallie’s lover and Shwinefelt’s rival. Dr. Fraud ,—Examining physician for the Yubee Co. Abe Brownschweiger and Ike Brownschweiger ,—Sallie’s brothers, school boys. Yokle ought to have about three yards of plaited corn husk, i. e. , half of an unsewed door mat, and, as the curtain rises he is plaiting, seated on a stool or chair, while Ike picks corn husks out of a basket and hands them to his “dawdy” as the latter needs them. Perhaps a spinning wheel for Frany would be better than sewing, or darning big woolen stockings. The costumes ought to be suitable. For Yokle , Frany and the rest of the family, farmers’ ordinary clothes, but not ragged nor dirty. Shwinefelt should be loudly dressed—large stand up collar with a red necktie, big cuffs, etc. Gust , like a clerk, not quite so flashy. Sally ought to be the well dressed beauty of the play. DIE INSHURANCE BUSINESS. ACT I. Scene I. — Brownschweiger’s sitting-room and kitchen. A family scene. Yokle smoking pipe and plaiting corn husk mat. Ike on the right picking and handing husks to him. Frany, in the center sewing, dressed in cap and white handkerchief pinned across her breast. On left, Grandmother Aunshitz in huge white cap and spectacles seated in arm-chair, scraping an apple and eating it. To her left, Sallie crocheting. Seated on the floor to the left, Abe is covering a ball. Empty chair between Yokle and Frany. Grandmother coughs a great deal. Yokle. Hurry up Ike und mach die wish net so dick. War der huxliter hide do, mam? Frany. Yaw, den nu’midag. Yokle. Wie feel hen die oyer und der butter g’macht? Frany. Der butter is yusht 14 and die oyer yusht 16. Und du waisht das dee hinkle net orrig layia by dem kolta wedder. Alles tsomma hut yusht $1.92 g’macht, und des mus ich hovva. Dee Sallie mus en Polenay und en hat hovva und— Abe. O yaw, sell is der wake. Dee Sallie mus alles hovva und ich mus worta. Der shool-maishter hot hite weeder g’saut ich set en neyee cheeografee greega. Ike. Yaw, dad, und ich mus en mental hovva. Yokle. Hob ich net neyee bicher grickt letsht winter? Abe. Yaw, ovver sie missa widder all neyee greega den winter. Yokle. Well, boova, ich kan eich ken neyee bicher kaufa shun widder. ( Granny coughs. ) Frany. Horich! ’skomt ebber. Wos net alles drunner und drivver. ( Bustles about and dusts chairs. ) ( Enter Henner Hoffman . Granny coughs. ) Hoffman. Good novet! Yokle and Frany . Denky! Nem der’n sitz, Henner. ( He seats himself near Granny . ) Hoffman. Kalt wedder. Yokle. Yaw, ’sis mechtig kalt. Frany. Dee kelt hot aw so free awgfanga den winter. Hoffman. Yaw! ( To Granny in a loud voice. ) Wee macht’s by eich als? Granny. Feicht draus, is es? ( Coughs. ) I ich hob net g’wist os es ebbes runner macht! Hoffman. ( Louder. ) Nay ich hob g’froagt wie deer aw kommt. Sider als g’sund. Granny. O, nay, ich bin shlecht—greislich shlecht. Ich hob evva den orriga hushta ( coughs ) un wer so eng. Und no bin ich so shlecht uf mina baw! Ich bin evva olt—hair aw so shlecht! Hoffman. Yaw, du guksht shlecht! Granny. Was? ( Coughs. ) Hoffman. ( Louder. ) I, ich sawg du guksht alendig! Granny. Yaw, du awe! ( Coughs. ) Hoffman. ( Turning to Yokle . ) Ich say der side busy? Frany. Yaw, ich hab na gsaut sie missa shoobutzer flechta oder sie derfa mir nimmy ins house met eera drekicha shtiffle. Yokle. Yaw, ’sdate note mer date dawg und nacht shoffa and ’swill doch net longa naryets. Bis dee wibeslite dee fashions noche g’macht hen und dee boova hen olly winter onnery bicher, bleibt ke cent ivverich bis es yore rum is. Hoffman. Ich will der evva sawga wees is, Yokle. Sis nimme wee es war for olders. Dee tzeida sin nimme wee see waura. Ich mane evva 'swair noch 'sbesht won de fry shoola net in der gong komma wara. Wee ich in dee shool gonga bin, zum olda Stoffle Bender, drunna ins Feeser’s Shpringhouse, do hut mer nix gevist fun denna sacha woo see olla wile in de shoola hen. Do hut mer larna bushtaweera, no hut mer glasa im Teshtament oder Psalter, and dee woo rechla und shriva hen wella dee hen kenna, oder hens kenna bliva lossa. Swor noch en fry lond sella mole. Abe. Hen see kay cheeografees g’shtudied sella zeit? Ike. Und kay Mental? Hoffman. Nix fun der ort. Und es hut shmartery menner und weiver gevva os es olla wile dute. Sallie. Yaw, ovver sella mole het der kay telagraph und kay rigglewake kot und— Abe. Und kay may machine. Yokle. Abe, holt dy moul ( Granny coughs. ) Hoffman. All sellie dinga het mer aw allewile besser net. Wy dee ferdifelda c