"Ganbei" Empties the Glass, "Suiyi" Does Not — Epoche A2
At a Chinese dinner table, two words decide how much you drink: ganbei and suiyi. Ganbei means "dry the cup". You empty it, and then you tip it towards the table so everyone can see that nothing is left. Suiyi means "as you please". A sip is enough, and nobody counts. My first night in Xi'an, I thought there was only one word. Someone stood up, said ganbei, and eight glasses went up. I emptied mine. It happened again, and I began to worry about the rest of the evening. Then the man beside me lifted his glass and said suiyi. He drank a little and sat down. Nobody looked at him. That was when I understood: suiyi is not a polite way of saying no. It is the other half of the rule. There is a second rule, and you can see it. When you touch glasses with someone older, or with your boss, you hold your own rim lower than theirs. It takes a second, and it says what the words do not. The Analects opens with a question: "Is it not a joy to have friends come from afar?" The joy is the point. Ganbei and suiyi both serve it. Only one of them costs you the morning.